Friendship isn’t just about the good times—it’s about having each other’s backs when things get tough, too. If you know that one of your friends is going through something or notice that they aren’t acting like themselves, here’s how you can show up for them:
- Check in. If you’ve noticed your friend seems down or distant, ask how they’re really doing. It’s not overstepping—it shows you care.
- Share what you’ve noticed. Let them know why you’re worried. You can say things like:
- You haven’t wanted to hang out lately.
- You don’t seem as energetic as usual.
- You’ve missed a lot of school. Do you want to talk about it?
- Listen without judging. Let them vent. Don’t try to fix everything—sometimes just listening is all they need.
- Invite them to do a low-stakes activity. Buy their favorite snacks and watch a movie, do homework together after school, or do your favorite hobbies alongside each other. Tell them there’s no pressure but you’d love to hang out, even if you’re just in each other’s presence.
- Remind them they’re not alone. When people are down, they pull away. Check in, text them, send a meme, or whatever it takes to remind them you’re here.
- Don’t play doctor. You don’t have to have all the answers. It’s okay to suggest talking to a trusted adult or counselor, or calling 9-8-8 for 24/7 support. And if you think there might be an immediate risk of your friend harming themselves or someone else, call 9-1-1 for help.
Remind them that it’s okay to ask for help, and that they matter to you.
